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County Hunter
Counties? You can hunt them?
by Ace Jansen, N3AHA
(This article ran in Worldradio, March 1998)
I can just imagine someone reading this column for the first
time thinking, "I've heard of huntin' deer and I've
heard of huntin' elk, but how can I hunt a county? I mean, I can't
eat it, so why would I want to hunt it?" It's been several
years since I've answered a basic question, "Why would anyone
in their right mind hunt counties?"
First off, let me declare a quick disclaimer to any potential
reading audience, I'm not in my right mind nor do I want to be
in my right mind and you can't make me be in my right mind, so
there. Now then. . .
For you hunting fans, county hunting does not involve guns
(sorry to disappoint you), and the NRA isn't even aware that county
hunting is a category of hunting. You see, it's a well-kept hunting
secret, shhhh! The object of county hunting is to search and find counties,
then pounce on them and declare victory. It's kinda like geographic
mud wrestling. One does not feel totally complete as a hunter of counties
until they have successfully sought out every last county - that
includes big counties, little counties, and counties not-so-formally known
as counties.
In order to answer the question, "What is County Hunting?",
I must ask you "What is County Hunting?" You see, as beauty
is in the eye of the beholder, so is county hunting in the eye of the
hunter of counties. What I am trying to communicate to you is what I meant
for you to read. So, I'll give you a couple of my definitions of
county hunting and then later, at your convenience, you can send me your
definition of county hunting. And you can also tell me why, in your right
mind, you would hunt counties.
County Hunting Definition #1
To be a successful county hunter using definition #1, you
must look at a map and put yourself, your actual body, in different geographical
locations known as counties. Therefore you must drive, walk, fly, take
a train or whatever is the cheapest means of transportation so that you
actually step foot in every U.S. county (shoes are optional). There are
lots of counties, so you'll probably not want to walk to all of
them.
As far as I know, only one person in their right mind could
completely call himself a county hunter using this definition. His name
is Allen Zondlak (yes, Allen Zondlak of St. Clair, Michigan) and he visited
all 3142 counties. Allen successfully transported his body to all state
counties, parishes, independent cities, Alaskan boroughs, and Alaskan
census areas. It took him 36 years to accomplish his high school dream.
If you need any proof, I'm sure he'd be happy to show you
his collection of bars of soap from inns, match-books from restaurants,
or 28,000 slides (now that would be fun... "and here's me
in front of the Welcome to Deaf Smith County sign...and here's
me in..."). All kidding aside, Allen accomplished something few have
tried. How about you, are you going to start hunting counties using definition
#1?
County Hunting Definition #2
This definition does not involve stepping foot in every
county and wearing shoes is still optional. To be a successful county
hunter using definition #2, one must operate an Amateur Radio from all
U.S. counties. So, it's sort of like definition #1 except you also
must make Amateur Radio contacts from all those places. It's actually
not as hard, because this award is offered by a group that doesn't
count counties the same way as Allen did. The Mobile Amateur RadioAwards
Club (MARAC) only counts 3,076 counties, so you see hunting counties using
definition #2 is 2.1% easier than definition #1.
And as you would expect, since it is 2.1% easier after all,
more people in their right minds can completely call themselves county
hunters using this definition. A total of two! Kenneth Wosika, KB7QO,
was the first to operate his Amateur Radio from all 3,076 counties, back
in 1986. It took Ken only four years and about 150,000 miles on his van
to accomplish this task. How does one operate their mobile Amateur Radio
station in Alaska or Hawaii, you ask? Ken drove and drove and drove until
he got to Alaska, then he drove some more into the judicial districts
in Alaska and he flew to Hawaii and rented a car.
Gene Kowalewski, W1TEE, was the 2nd and only other completely
successful county hunter using definition #2. Gene added a little twist
to his accomplishment, he operated Amateur Radio from all 3,076 counties
using Morse code. It took Gene four years to operate mobile from the 48
contiguous states, but another two years to make the venture to Alaska
and Hawaii. Gene flew to Alaska and Hawaii and rented cars. Gene estimates
it took him 136,100 miles on his trusty Plymouth Duster, 5,108 gallons
of gasoline, and 282 quarts of oil. But, who's counting?
County Hunting Definition #3
Definition #3 also involves Amateur Radio contacts, but
this time with someone else operating from all those 3,076 counties. This
accomplishment does not require any movement and shoes are definitely
optional again. You see, in order to be a successful county hunter using
definition #3, an Amateur Radio operator must make Amateur Radio contact
with other Amateur Radio operators in all 3,076 counties. This time, CQ
Magazine defines the number of counties, which not-so-coincidentally are
the same as definition #2. Since it doesn't involve any visits
to other counties, and you can pretty much be as lazy as you like, there
are many more completely successful county hunters using this definition,
in fact, 944, as you'll see later. The scary thing is that not
only are there many more people in their right minds county hunting this
way, but there also right-minded Amateur Radio operators from other countries
hunting U.S. counties. Amateurs from 18 other countries have made radio
contact with all 3,076 counties.
This award, CQ Magazine's USA Counties Award (USA-CA),
is a beautiful addition to any Amateur Radio operator's shack wall.
People of all ages pursue this award, partially because of the award's
beauty, but mostly to accomplish something few have accomplished and few
in their right mind have attempted. The award is available for making
Amateur Radio contacts with just 500 counties.
So, what are we to make of the fact that there are only
944 Amateur Radio operators who have contacted all 3,076 counties. In
other words, what's wrong with the rest of y'all. If you
haven't contacted all 3,076 counties, are you really in your right
mind or are you just waiting for county hunter definition #4? Hmmm, I'll
bet the internet has something to say about county hunter definition #4.
The question is, will it be easier than definitions 1-3? When are you
going to start hunting counties? Instead of choosing your weapon, choose
your county hunting definition and hunt away.
Latest USA-CA Recipients
938 KD4ABC 07 Nov 97
939 W1VXV 09 Nov 97
940 KJ8V 11 Nov 97
941 AE4FL 11 Nov 97
942 KT1M (N1JAC) 14 Nov 97
943 NA7W 03 Dec 97
944 KF8UN 08 Dec 97 By now, you are well versed in the hush-hush
world of hunting counties. Again, these are the only hunting county definitions
that I am aware of and I welcome any other right-minded definitions that
you may have or can make up. Until May, happy hunting! However you do
it ... do it!
73, Ace, N3 aha!
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